Experiential Travel

How to Truly Connect with a Destination

As I keep telling friends who like to vacation like they are eating fast food, they need to slow down and take in the sights. Travel isn't just about ticking places off a list. It's not about rushing through a city, snapping a photo of the main attraction, posting it on social media with your smiling face, and moving on huffing to the next item on the list. The best travel experiences—the ones that stay in your memory—happen when you immerse yourself in a place where you stop being just an outsider, a visitor and start becoming a participant, a neighbor, or a local.

That's called experiential travel. It's about taking the time to slow down. It's about engaging with the culture. When you do this, you leave the place feeling like you are truly engaged with a piece of its heart and soul.

I've always believed that to really know a place, you have to eat the food, talk to the people, learn the rhythms, and step outside your comfort zone. Ask the woman in the market, "How is life for you?" and listen to her response. You will learn so much from her musings. Here are other ways to make your next trip more meaningful through experiential travel.

1. Eat Like a Local, Not a Tourist

One of the first things I do when I arrive somewhere new is to find out where the locals eat. Look for that crowded restaurant of local people. Have you ever been to a small town and realized that everyone and their Mama are in one particular restaurant? Go there.

In Mérida, Mexico, instead of heading to a touristy restaurant, I asked a taxi driver where he had lunch. That's how my family and I ended up at a street-side shack with outdoor seating under a makeshift galvanized roof. It was a family-run spot. I had cochinita pibil, a popular stripped pork dish served on banana leaves. The pork melted in my mouth. I don't even eat meat typically, but I made an exception for this.

In Monrovia, Liberia, my friends there took me and my colleague to an off-the-road restaurant where only locals ate. They have one or two items on the menu. I always had the spinach and smoked fish. My colleague had the chicken foot, which was just too much for me to see the claws sticking out their mouths. It gave the unrealistic impression that they had a whole chicken in their mouths.

Experiential eating isn't just about food—it's about connection. Ask the server what's their favorite. Chat with the cook if they're willing and have time to come out. Food is storytelling. Stay a long time to talk, rather than rushing off. It's how cultures pass down traditions, how families bond, and how strangers become friends over a shared meal. Who knows what new friendships or even business connections you will find?

2. Take a Class or Learn a Local Skill

The best souvenirs aren't fridge magnets, shot glasses, cups, and t-shirts. They're skills and memories.

In Antigua, I watched my grandmother make bread and cook over an open fire on a coal pot when I was a child. Years later, while traveling, I realized how powerful it is to learn a local craft firsthand. One of my birthday gifts in Atlanta was a cooking class for Indian food. I learned about all the spices I had never even used before. In Lisbon, I joined a Latin rhyme dance class. In both cases, I enjoyed the international nature of the place.

Learning a local craft, dance, or tradition lets you carry a piece of that culture or at least a memory of the place with you forever.

3. Stay in a Home, Not a Hotel

I don't mind hotels. Hotels are fine, but if you really want to understand daily life in a place, stay where locals live. That was the whole point of Airbnb and Vrbo before they got so commercialized.

Short-term rentals can be a great way to experience residential neighborhoods, but if you really want immersion, look for guesthouses, farm stays, or homestays with a family. When I stayed in a converted barnhouse in Aix en Provence, France, the host family took us to their farm. I could not understand the deep-country farmer French of our host, but I had a great time. We used the place as our base while we visited the south of France. In the evenings, I listened to our host repay his life stories over wine. The wine never helped me understand, but it was still great fun.

That's experiences you won't get at a five-star resort.

4. Step Off the Beaten Path

Venture out and be curious. Just be willing to walk a lot. Some of the best places aren't always in the guidebooks.

Some of my favorite experiences happened when I wandered away from the crowds. In Naxos, Greece, instead of staying on the well-known beaches, we hiked inland to a mountain chapple and later found myself among herds of goats on the hillside. Later, for good measure, we had a goat dinner at a local restaurant. Then, in Mikonos, we stumbled on an organic wine vineyard where we tasted the sweetest wine and ate tomatoes from the vine.

In São Miguel, Portugal, we hiked down a valley coast. I came upon a guy who showed us his farm, introduced us to his wife, and sang for us. I wrote about that in another blog. All I said to trigger spending 2 hours with this man was, "Hello, how are you? Do you live here?" He even shared his homemade wine.

Experiential travel means allowing for surprises. Go to the main attractions if you want, but also leave time to explore without an agenda.

5. Talk to People—And Really Listen

This is the most important part for me. Travel is about sights and activities, but it's also about people. Yep! The memories you make with the people far outlast the fun time you had waiting in line for that Disney attraction.

Ask an elder in the town square about their life. Do as I did in São Miguel, and walk up to a guy looking at people passing and talk to him. He was a stranger for only about one minute. By the time I left, we were friends. Chat with the street vendor about how long they've been selling their food and what part of the country they are from. When I was in Sri Lanka, my driver told me his life story from all my prompting. I recounted that story in this blog.

The key is to listen more than you talk. Be curious. Ask questions. Be respectful. Be open. People often want to tell their story. You'll be amazed at what they will share if you take the time to actively listen to them.

My Final Thoughts

Experiential travel is a really cool way to have an interesting trip. It opens your world to how other people live and helps you recognize the similarities. When you engage deeply with a place, you don't just pass through it like a race car. You carry a part of it with you forever in your memories.

So next time you travel, don't just go and tick the boxes. Experience the place and the people.